That's right, I said it! The Willow series released this year is not the worst thing made by Disney,And I can confidently say that after watching all the episodes leading up to now. And no, I do NOT have a Disney+ subscription, I wouldn't be stupid enough to throw my money at those cancerous parasites. Like any good, smart, decent human being, I go to pirating websites (in this case, fmovies) for the majority of my viewing pleasure. That being said, while it isn't the worst thing made, it is DESERVING of the backlash it gets. I get why people don't like this series, but if I may play devil's advocate here, let me break down what I think of the series so far.Plot: Set almost twenty years after the events of the movie, Sorsha is now queen of Tir Asleen and had a pair of twins named Kit and Airk with Madmatigan, who disappeared before the start of the series. Kit is the obnoxious, self-centered, bratty, muff-munching "tough girl" that's festering much of our media, while Airk is...well he's the DID, Douche in Distress. Right off the bat, we see that Airk is a womanizing asshole, while Kit has the hots for a female knight-in-training named Jade, because of course there's a female knight-in-training who's going to be "the bestest EVAR",A party is held to commemorate the wedding between Kit and Graydon, the Beta bi---, I mean "prince" of Galadorn, and is just the picture of masculine virility, what with his thin build and mousey demeanor, the dude's a chick magnet...at least I'm assuming that's what the producers think. Anyway, Kit humiliates Graydon, much like how life does on a daily basis, and Kit comes down with a case of Disney Princess syndrome and decides to run away from home to have her own life. You can just FEEL the creativity coming off of this series already! But just before Kit can make her escape, right after visiting Jade one last time,
https://youtu.be/aFR4CF4eQU0?t=110
(skip to 1:48)Tir Asleen comes under attack by mysterious forces, kidnaps Airk, and a rescue party is formed to find Willow the Sorcerer and rescue Airk before anything bad befalls the world, and that's the basic synopsis of the FIRST episode, and it goes down-hill, with some slight up-hills, from there. I'm gonna go with the things I DID like before I tear this series a new one.Pros (so far):MOST of the main cast/characters. The character I found to be, at the very least, tolerable, were Willow, Elora Danan (yep, she's in this series proper as Willow's apprentice), Graydon the beta male who actually has some something to con tribute to the team, and Boorman, the stand-in for the muscle/greatest swordsman who actually is allowed by the series writers and producers to be more than just a joke, and has a past with Madmartigan. Warwick Davis reprises his role from the 1988 film as Willow Ufgood, and despite looking good for a guy entering his fifties, you can just hear in his voice how weary he is. Despite that, he does a decent job as the DeFacto leader of the group and Elora's teacher, where he actually, *gasp* teaches her stuff!,Yeah, and this leads into Elora Danan being a decent character in that, despite being the "special" in the series, she doesn't start out knowing absolutely freaking everything and actually has to LEARN and PRACTICE spells and magic. In other words, she's the anti-Rey Palpatine, and that is a Godsend compared to what Disney/Lucas routinely shit out. She's also flawed and vulnerable, having difficulty believing in herself, and gradually comes to accept her role. Graydon, despite being effeminate, (the series can try to ship GraydonxElora all they want, he will always look like a twink), he shows that he's knowledgeable and aids Elora with her studies. And then we have Boorman. Despite being something of a clownish rogue, he's still a badass able to hold his own in most fights, actually escaped from an otherwise inescapable slave mine singlehandedly (even if he did embellish some facts), and shocker of all shocks, he's allowed to be a badass without getting emasculated by the other characters, DESPITE a couple of their worst efforts, but I digress. while he is something of a goof and punchline for some of the series "humor", keep in mind that Madmartigan from the 1988 film also had his less-than-graceful moments:,
https://youtu.be/4T40vj40ZZQ?t=176
2. The visual and practical effects: I can't believe I'm saying this, but the effects aren't half bad, in that they're not eye-bleedingly God-awful to look at. There's some decent practical effects and costumes thrown in, including the troll suits, some of the Crone's followers, and even the props and sets look just north of "mediocre". Cons (so far):Kit and Jade: Yep, they're lesbians. Yep, they're annoying as fuck. And nope, so far they haven't died yet! Good God, these two are basically the embodiment of what's wrong with this series, and serve as a microcosm of what's wrong with MOST of the series produced by Disney, especially Kit! All she does, when there isn't an action scene for her to show off her mediocre sword skills, is pout, bitch, whine, complain, and drag down the story to have it forcibly revolve around her, much like how a large planet forces other celestial bodies around it with its gravitational force, it's just that in Kit's case, her ego has the gravitational force of a collapsed star! I have never seen a character this entitled since fucking She-Hulk! And that's when she's not attacking Elora Dannan at every chance she gets, just constantly trying to bring her down like a jealous sibling. She's just so nasty and unpleasant to be around that when she got captured by the end of episode five, I was actually cheering and secretly hoped that she'd get torn apart! Jade isn't much better, at least not by much. She doesn't complain as much, but when she does, she's almost as bad as Kit. Her biggest problem is that she's just so forgettable. She's supposed to be the long-lost daughter of General Kael from the first film, but there's literally no resemblance, aside from her slight skill with a sword. But other than that, she's basically a femme version of Boorman. There's no reason for her to be on this quest, and is only around to remind us that Kit is queer! And speaking of! The Identity Politics: Yep, there's some IP in this series, and I'm sure that's just shocking for you to know this,Like I said before, Kit loves to get petted by Jade, but there's also a pair of woodsmen who show up...well woodswomen, and we don't know if they're sisters, cousins, friends, or lovers, but considering who made this series I'm going to go with option four. And then there's the fact that Graydon and Boorman are played by Tony Revolori and Amar Chadha-Patel respectively, forcing in more of that diversity of skin color into a series mainly set in a fictional MEIDEVAL EUROPEAN SETTING, but given that they're being written competently makes them work despite that, but they're far from the only non-fair skinned people in this, again, MEIDEVAL EUROPEAN SETTING! But compared to the others that's come out recently, ie "Rings of Power", the insertion of IP in this series is downright subtle. But hey, got to reflect the world we live in for the sweeping masses that make up the "modern audience" after all! 3. The Script: Sweet bleeding Christ on a crucifix, could the dialogue get any more 2016!? Seriously, I ask you, for those who have seen the series, could the dialogue get anymore modernized and cringey. For those of you who don't know...here's a taste, and I apologize in advance:,Yes, that sensation of your skin crawling is normal, God knows I've felt it too watching this bile. And yes, it's throughout the entire series. 4. The Writing: Or in this case, lack thereof, because very little thought went into this series. The script is atrocious, as stated above; a lot of the episodes are filled with filler and awkward moments and scenes; hardly any character development or building is done, and that's if characters aren't completely forgotten about (like Airk); and moments that are supposed to be grand, uplifting, or emote some sort of emotion are pockmarked with inappropriate seconds of humorless levity. I'd go on, but then I'd be doing what the writers of this show are doing; jerking people around and not getting to the point! 5. Piss-poor Editing: Oh my God, you have NO IDEA how many scenes just dragged on and on and on! sixty percent of the time, my brain is just going:,Whether it be exploring an area or trying to have a moment, it just goes on and long outlives its expiration date! I'm pretty sure the original editor they were supposed to hire wasn't just fired, he was brutally murdered and replaced with a mindless office drone whose sole purpose is to execute Kathleen Kennedy's will! 6. The Soundtrack: When it's not busy sounding like every other generic fantasy-adventure soundtrack, there are modern pop songs, and even worse remixes of popular songs, at the end credits, audibly raping your ear drums because the makers of this series hate you and everything you stand for. I couldn't even differentiate most of the pieces because they all sound almost exactly alike! It's like the old Atari and Nintendo games just repeating the same music over and over!Lots of problems, and I totally get why people dislike it. But it's not the worst thing ever. And the only reason why I'm doing this is because of the Critical Drinker:,
https://youtu.be/rLRHR2Nou8A
specifically when he said this:
https://youtu.be/rLRHR2Nou8A?t=724 . So just so we're clear, Willow is worse than this:,
https://youtu.be/5paV1wyuMvg?t=22
Or this:,Or this:,
https://youtu.be/vICEUzzu4SM?t=12
Or even this:,Look, I typically like the Critical Drinker, I really do. I love his videos on Anakin Skywalker and Admiral Holdo, and on what happened to our villains, and I think his videos on "Why Modern Movies Suck" should be viewed by everyone, especially by people who want to be filmmakers one day. But when he makes a vid that I disagree with, I can't keep my mouth shut. So no, Drinker, I honestly don't think Willow is worse than She-Hulk or Rings of Power. With those two series, I couldn't even get through the first episode without flying into a blind rage, whereas with Willow, I barely made it through while controlling my anger. It sure as fuck ain't good, but it's definitely not worse than those two, that's like comparing a lump of coal to two dog turds. Would I recommend watching this series? The only reason why I did is because I have a soft spot for the movie, as it's one of my personal favorite non-LOTR fantasy movies, and I legit wanted to see the story continue with Elora Dannan and Willow. And yes, I did in fact read the books and was curious to see if they would follow said books. And apparently, it's obvious that the creators never knew said books existed. So I can't, in good conscience, recommend it to casual viewers, only to, maybe, fans of the film because they might get something out of it. I sure as hell hope I will.
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